Award-winning UCLA psychology professors and authors of Intimate Relationships Thomas Bradbury and Benjamin Karney have been exploring best practices to increase inclusivity in intimate relationships courses throughout their careers. First acknowledging their perspective as straight, white men, they discuss the challenges they’ve encountered in creating an inclusive classroom environment and offer solutions for how instructors can make their intimate relationships course as inclusive as possible. This content is derived from Norton’s workshop “Creating an Inclusive Intimate Relationships Course.” Request the recording here.
Teaching an intimate relationships course requires sensitivity to diversity. As students explore how they fit in social relationships, they bring unique backgrounds, perspectives, and identities into the classroom. Many students haven’t been exposed to thinking about various types of relationships; it’s the instructor’s job to frame diversity as central—not secondary—to the course.
Unlike less personal subjects, teaching intimate relationships involves navigating students’ experiences, perspectives, and beliefs. Students bring personal histories and assumptions to classes on intimacy, which can lead to challenging moments when these deeply held beliefs are questioned. How can instructors address and reframe these preconceived assumptions with respect and empathy?
Despite the best intentions to create an inclusive classroom, the answer to this question is more challenging than you might think. Historically, research on intimate relationships has centered around middle-class, heterosexual, white college couples, largely overlooking other racial, ethnic, and sexual identities, as well as non-college-educated and international populations. Teaching a research-backed intimate relationships course, therefore, means searching beyond the most-cited studies in the discipline. It can also require frequent acknowledgment of the field’s historical lack of diversity.
Thankfully, societal views on intimacy have evolved, and the research studies are slowly following. When we began teaching two decades ago, conversations rarely addressed nonbinary and transgender identities, but today, these identities are increasingly integrated into classroom discussions. It’s critical for instructors to stay current on these shifts to ensure a sense of belonging for all students in the course.
As you contemplate how to make your own intimate relationships course as inclusive as possible, we recommend six strategies to guide you:
- Watch Your Language: Language matters. Instructors should avoid heteronormative terms, gendered language, and assumptions about ideal family structures. We have moved away from terms like “opposite-sex relationships” in favor of “same-sex” or “different-sex,” reflecting a more inclusive approach.
- Acknowledge the Limits of Science: Science is rarely universally applicable. Recognizing the limits of existing research prevents overgeneralization and validates diverse identities. This approach opens the classroom for broader discussions, acknowledging that while some groups may be underrepresented in research, their experiences are still essential.
- Seek Out Diverse Research and Scholars: Incorporating work by diverse scholars into your course gives students the opportunity to see themselves reflected in the course material. While preparing Intimate Relationships, Fourth Edition, we partnered with Norton to ensure scholars from diverse backgrounds reviewed the drafts, bringing a richer perspective to the content.
- Use Inclusive Examples: Examples in lectures, exams, and textbooks should reflect various backgrounds and identities, steering away from stereotypes. For instance, we suggest using students’ names from the class roster in exam questions to foster inclusivity.
- Create a Brave Space for Open Discussion: Intimate relationships courses offer a unique opportunity for students to explore who they are and share openly with their peers. The classroom should be a “brave space” where students feel safe but are also gently challenged. Instructors can model acceptance, remaining sensitive and supportive of students’ vulnerabilities.
- Stay Humble and Curious: Mistakes are inevitable, and it’s easy to become defensive. We emphasize the importance of openness to critique and encourages students to provide feedback, even privately, if they’re uncomfortable speaking in class.
Creating an inclusive course on intimate relationships is challenging but rewarding. When students feel safe exploring sensitive topics and expressing their identities, and when they see themselves represented in the curriculum, the classroom becomes a space for profound personal and social growth.
Continue exploring ways to make your intimate relationships class more inclusive by watching the full workshop here or requesting your copy of Intimate Relationships.
MEET THE AUTHORS
Benjamin R. Karney teaches at the University of California, Los Angeles, where he offers graduate and undergraduate classes on intimate relationships. He researches the various ways that intimate partners interpret the events of their relationships and the effects of stress on lower-income and military marriages. Ben is the proud parent of two children, Daniella and Gabriel, and owns far too many books.
Image credit: Photo by Michal Czerwonka
Thomas N. Bradbury is a Distinguished Professor of Psychology at the University of California, Los Angeles, specializing in using observational and longitudinal methods to examine how newlywed marriages develop and change. He lives in Los Angeles with his wife and two very large and affectionate Bernese Mountain Dogs.
Image credit: Tim Bradbury